The Mom Crowd

At a recent dinner party I attended the husbands were lovingly razzing us Stay at Homes Moms, because we only call them at work to see if we can spend fifteen bucks at Target. One husband wondered out loud how a mom who “stays home” could use so much gas in one week. The wives and I retorted that they should be thankful for having such low maintenance wives and how in the big picture we barely spend money.

One mom and I realized that we don’t even wash our face with proper face wash, because we are so cheap. So this got me thinking about what other things make us frugal mamas.

Here are 10 signs that you might be a Frugal Mama:

1. You wear the same three pair of blue jeans over and over.

2. You love the little red stickers at Target.

3. You buy Easter and Christmas dresses for the next year on clearance the year before.

4. You check the Baby+Kids section of Craigslist everyday looking for deals.

5. You are up early on Saturday mornings hitting the sales in front yards.

6. You talk yourself out of buying the items you picked up while standing in the checkout line.

7. You brag about what you saved in coupons and sales after every trip to the grocery store.

8. You haven’t had a hair cut in six months.

9. You love the challenge of coming in under budget.

10. You don’t buy toys, because you wait for family and friends to buy them for you.

What makes you a Frugal Mama?

- photo courtesy of iChris.

Ewan (the oldest) got his first ice cream when he was 2.  2!  Can you believe that? I thought for sure that if a morsel of sugar passed his lips any earlier he’d turn into a sugar loving crazed kid. I know now that all kids will be lovers of sugar. Doesn’t matter what age you introduce it to them. I don’t remember how old Isaac (middle child) was when he got his first cookie or ice cream but he was a lot younger. When we thought Ewan was old enough to start chewing gum then it was hard to keep it from Isaac too. I try to tell myself that their 14 month age difference has a lot to do with it but I think I like to rationalize.

Well, apparently the age for gum chewing with the third child is 18 months.  Okay, well maybe our third child found some gum in my purse, knew what it was, unpeeled it, knew to put it in his mouth and chew.  I didn’t give it to him.  But I didn’t freak out after he put it in his mouth either (which I would have after child #1 or 2).  I waited to see what would happen.  I figured he would swallow it.  Or spit it out somewhere. Speaking of which, I should probably go see if I can find that chewed treasure somewhere.  But he figured out how to chew it and swallow the juices that come from a yummy piece of gum.  He chewed it longer than Ewan or Isaac did when they were first getting the hang of gum.

In truth, since I am a slightly seasoned parent, some of my parenting views and philosophies have changed too so that makes a difference in some of my decision making. I know someday I’ll hear the words from Ewan, “But MOM, you NEVER used to let me do _______!” And I’ll respond, “Wait till you have kids…”

I couldn’t resist showing you the utter joy that Graham (the 18 month old) had with his first gum chewing escapade.
So, what have you gotten “slack” on since becoming a parent of 2 or more? What kinds of things seem less important to you than before when it comes to parenting?

Over at San Diego Momma’s blog she has a post running where the people in the comments leave a blog prompt for the Commenter before them. Got it? You can check out the original post about it here and a clarifying post about it here. San Diego Momma is one of the coolest bloggers ever. She met me on a blind blogger date when I happened to be in San Diego. She even let me interview her when I didn’t know what I was doing. You can check out the video of our interview here. So enough gushing about San Diego Momma and on to the prompt.

Jessica at BernThis.com gave me this prompt: Tell us the worst decision you think you’ve made in your life and why and if you need more to write about, tell us the best decision you made and why.

The Worst Decision

I really don’t believe in regrets, so the first question is kind of hard for me. In 29 years of living I have thankfully not have had to deal with a lot of bad decisions. The first one that comes to mind is that I feel like I wasted 2 years of my awesome time in college dating this one guy. He struggled with homosexuality and didn’t want to live that lifestyle. So I felt like I could fix him. At least if he had a girlfriend, then people wouldn’t think he was gay. Nosy college students would ask me anyway. Thankfully I didn’t go as far as Mary in the movie ‘Saved!’ In fact, we never kissed, because we were going to save our first kiss for our wedding.  We were pretty close to getting engaged, but we ultimately broke up because I feel like I woke up and saw that we weren’t a good match.  He just wasn’t paying any attention to me. I had to beg him to meet me for dinner, so I could break up with him. I feel like some of that time was wasted.

Kelly Willis sings a song called ‘Find Another Fool.’ I often think of him when I hear the song. The first 2 verses read like this:

Now we’re down to saying our goodbyes
And you still don’t see the truth
All I did was try to make life better for you
But a woman just gets tired of being used

So find another fool to love you
The world is full of girls like me
Find a fool to take care of you
That’s a girl I’d like to see
Who’ll be the one when all is said and done
I know you
You’ll find another fool

I sort of did feel like a fool when it was all said and done. Many friends and family came up to me and said that they were glad that we broke up afterwords. I then wondered – why didn’t they tell me sooner!

About a year or two later I met my husband and was glad that I met him at the end of college, because we decided to get married after we graduated. I don’t know if I could have been engaged for more than 6 months!

The Best Decision

The best decision I feel like I have ever made was moving to San Antonio in 1998 to attend the University of Texas at San Antonio. Moving away from my family and starting a new life all on my own is one of my proudest moments in life. I didn’t know a single person when I moved to a completely new city. I quickly found friends and a job. Since graduating college I have married, had a good paying job in my major, and now do what I love as a Stay At Home Mom.

I feel like since I have moved once on my own that I can do it again (now with a family), but there isn’t any rush. I seriously love my town and those that have become my family and friends here.

———

Thanks, Jessica, for the prompt. Sorry I can’t come up with anything juicier for ya in the worst decision department. I can’t wait to read your post on a smell that takes you back or reminds you of something from Melanie at A Dramatic Mommy!

 So what are the best and worst decisions of your life? 

Did any of y’all catch post-Superbowl episode of The Office?  Stanley had a heart attack, and after he returned to work, he carried around a bio-feedback machine, which “alerts me when my stress level goes up so I can try to calm down!”  (Every time boss Michael Scott came close to Stanley, the machine would beep frantically.)

I thought about that scene yesterday when I was trying to get the kids ready to go out for the evening.  I figured my bio-feedback machine, if I had one, would be in an agitated state.  It was about 3:45 p.m.  I had to get the kids up from their naps and ready to get out of the house by 4:20.  Granted, had I used naptime more wisely, most of the following would have been completed before the kids got up, but let’s not get off topic:

• Change Eli’s diaper
• Get Lucy into her underwear
• Get the kids a graham cracker & milk
• Pack dinners for all of us
• Get diaper bag packed
• Lock doors, close blinds, and set recorder to tape Lost (of course)
• Remember my camera
• Remind Lucy to use the potty
• Remind Lucy that she can’t go potty in the car, then
• Put on jackets & shoes
• Put on my jacket & shoes
• Shuffle the toddlers out into the garage
• Endure Lucy’s repeated phrase: “No, I do it!!!“
• Find Eli’s pacifier
• Put Eli in his carseat
• Put Lucy in her carseat
• Start car early to get the heater going
• Find Lucy’s favorite song on the cd
• Remind Lucy to practice asking nicely for her favorite song on the cd
• Call Dave to tell him we’re running late

And throughout all of this, both Lucy and Eli were working through their post-nap stress syndrome, involving a hefty amount of whining, crying, and throwing oneself onto the floor. And a steady stream of declarations from Lucy: “I want to take that book.  No, I want to take that book.  No, I want to zip it!  Eli, don’t!  I don’t want to go potty!!  I want the white blanket, not the purple one!  Watch out, doggie!  I want my milk!”

Yeah, my bio-feedback machine would be having a field day.  It’s going off just typing this.

What time of day would your machine beep excessively?

Pregnancy Lesson #236  – If you are hugely pregnant and you have to pee, don’t hold it. It is physically impossible to hold it, so don’t even try.

You never know when you will be holding your pee, doing just one more thing before the going to the restroom and your husband comes along and makes you laugh. Its starts off innocently with just a drop and you think, “It’s okay, it’s just a drop.” But you are still laughing and it keeps going. Then you are laughing because you are actually peeing and you see your husband realize that you are in fact wetting your pants.

Mortified you just stand there. Luckily you are happy that you are standing on the tile in the kitchen. You look down and realize that your favorite flip-flops are getting wet so you widen your stance a bit so they don’t get even more wet than they already are. You chant to yourself, “Pee is sterile. It can be washed. It can be washed.”

After it is all said and done your husband valiantly cleans the pee in the kitchen and watches the toddler. All while you shower and put your favorite jeans and flip-flops in the washer.

When you get over the shock of what just happened you are just thankful that it didn’t happen outside of your home, that no one else was in the house and it happened on the tile. You vow to never hold your pee again.

Um, yeah, this all happened to me this evening right before dinner! hahaa