The Mom Crowd

I hope you are honored some small way this Mother’s Day! I have only been a mom for exactly one year, but this has been the proudest year of my life. I mentioned earlier this week that I enjoy creative writing. I got a few minutes to myself tonight at Barnes and Nobles and I wrote this poem for Mother’s Day. (Of course WordPress doesn’t like my cool formatting, so it took out my extra spaces.) I hope it inspires you to blog or journal some your favorite sounds, sights, touches, tastes, and smells of being a mom.

The Five Senses of Being a Mom

Hearing you laugh
when you wake in your crib
Singing in my ears
“Mama” and “Dada”
Listening to cabinet doors open
and all the Tupperware thumping to the floor
Knowing all your toy songs by heart
“One giraffe has spots all over him…”
Discerning all your cries
and knowing exactly what you need

Snacking on your tiny toes
Mashing bananas in oatmeal
Retrieving tree bark and petrified bread pieces
from your little mouth
Taking away your joy of eating
my black flip flops
Introducing you to avocado, butternut squash
and asparagus
Delighting in cheerios
lined around the coffee table

Smelling lavender and soap bubbles
lulling you to sleep
Catching the smell of roses and star-gazers
in the bright delivery room
Transitioning to solids
brings a whole new aroma to the room
Folding fresh miniature shirts and shorts
wafting of Spring mountain breeze
Rubbing my nose in your round
baby-fresh belly

Seeing your swaddled petite body
placed on my chest
Gazing into your beautiful brown eyes
Catching my breath every time
I see your first steps
Staring at you in my arms
all day long
Walking into the nursery
and seeing you stand up for the first time
Watching you grow and develop
in leaps and bounds

Cradling my sweet baby in my arms
Pressing my finger
into your tiny fisted hand
Squeezing your plump thighs
in my gentle grip
Holding your hand
as you walk across the room
Swinging you up in my arms
and kissing you all over

One of my hobbies is creative writing. I was inspired to keep a creative writing journal after reading (most of) Natalie Golberg’s book, “Writing Down the Bones.” I saw Dawn mention the book on her blog once. It is a collection of short essays giving advice and tips on how to be a better writer. A goal that I am always working on is to become a better writer and story teller.

One way that I have been working on improving my writing is by flexing my writing muscles with San Diego Momma’s Tuesday Prompts. Every Tuesday she posts a writing prompt and you must post your response on your blog or in the comments on her site. It is really fun to see what everyone writes. I feel like it is like a Best Shot Monday for writers. Even if you aren’t remotely creative with words you should take a chance and try it! You might even surprise yourself.

Online literary magazines are a great source of inspiration for me. I have even thought about trying to write pieces of my own for submission to them. I am not completely sure of the submission guidelines. Who knows if I ever will, but it is a nice goal for me to keep in the back of my head.

Literary Mama has some fascinating stories. I just read “Alpha Mom,” by Kelly Fordon. The story was incredibly sad, but it was also really good because it stirred up a lot of emotions in me. I just checked and read that it was a fiction piece. Thank God! The story reminds me of Anita Shreve’s novel, “Sea Glass,” because the writing and characters are interesting until you get to the depressing ending.

Mamazine is interesting. They pride themselves in writing about other mom interests besides crafts and car seats. I enjoyed and related very much to “First Spoon,” By Odarka Stockert.

When I think of online women literary magazines my first thought goes to my friend, Janell’s, literary magazine called, The Fringe. I read Jennifer Ann Janisch’s Non-Fiction piece “Solo.” The whole time I was thinking “What are you doing!?” It is incredibly well written. I was so immersed in her story that I didn’t hear my baby crying in her crib after her nap until my husband asked me if I heard her.

Mom Writer’s Literary Magazine is another online literary magazine for moms. I related a little too well to Michele Markarian’s “Miles in the Morning.” My daughter isn’t in my face yet, but I hear her in her crib as I pull up my covers and pretend her cries don’t exist.

Finally, I read in Literary Mama’s blog that TravelingMamas.com “is in search of true uplifting, funny, inspirational, and touching stories with a travel theme for an upcoming anthology series. Possible themes may include family travel, romantic escapes, girlfriend getaways, and solo trips. ” The deadline is September 1,2008 and they may even give you $50. Check out the blog post for more information.

Do you enjoy creative writing? How about on your blog? Have you ever read any of these literary magazines? What do you think of them?

My little girl celebrated her first birthday with a party at our house this weekend. So I decided I should probably finish putting her nursery together, you know, so I can show it off to all my family and friends. Luckily Ace can’t talk yet and complain about my wall color choice or beg for Dora posters. The nursery still isn’t complete. There are two blue v-shaped floating shelves that I am waiting for my husband to hang.

We started the nursery when I was pregnant. We didn’t find out the gender so we wanted a gender-neutral room. Also, we are planning a second child some time soon and I didn’t want to re-theme the same room for the second one. I am way too cheap frugal that way. We chose a light lime/apple color for walls. We matched the wall paint to a pair crib sheets we picked out. Then anchored the room with white furniture and blue and orange accents.

The Room

* Diaper Champ! love it. Gift from baby shower
* White Dresser from Ikea – $69.99
* Changing pad from a baby shower gift.
* Oatmeal laundry basket – Gift from baby shower
* Dump truck from my niece.
* Orange hanging storage unit from Ikea – $4.99. This is a great place to store all those bazillion stuffed animals that we receive as gifts. Really, how many stuffed animals does a girl need?
* Dimmer on the wall from Lowe’s – $20
* Art by me.

* Crib from Babies R’ Us – A gift from my in-laws and Uncle at my baby shower!
* Sage Gerber Crib Sheet from Babies R’ Us – $7.99
* White Dust Ruffle from Babies R’ Us – $17.99
* Art by me.

* Do you see the strange blue things in the corner? Those are the two blue wall shelves from Ikea that need to be hung – $6.99 each.
* Hedda Multicolor curtains from Ikea – $29.99
* Bright orange sheers from Ikea – $14.99 for a pack of two
* Curtain hardware from Ikea – $3.99 for rod – $1.49 for hardware.
* Marley the monkey and stroller were gifts.

* White bookshelf is a hand-me-down from my friend, Barb.
* Blue storage bins from Ikea – $1.49 each.
* Books, frame, and stuffed animals were gifts.

The Closet

* Large storage boxes from Ikea – $6 for pack for 2.
* Small boxes for clothes (notice: they are all labeled!) – $3.99 for 2.

Lighting

* Magnesium Spotlight System from Ikea – $69.99. I saw a picture of a nursery with cool track lighting and found this alternative. They were really easy to install. We also added a dimmer. I also like how the S-shape mimics the pattern in the curtains.

Art

* Canvases were a total of $35. I can’t remember. Brushes – $3. I used leftover wall paint for the paint. I am not an artist and this was my first attempt. I used to see abstract pieces of art and think, “I could do that!” Now I know why art costs so much. I didn’t have the right paint and my skills simply aren’t the best. I did these really quickly last week.

* The circle art is inspired by Essence-Chocolate and Essence-Blue from art.com.

* The alphabet piece highlights my daughter’s initials in orange. I remember seeing a website where they would create an artwork piece with your child’s name highlighted in the alphabet. It just worked out the A,C, and E are the beginning for me.

Putting together Ace’s nursery was incredibly fun for me. Can you tell I love Ikea? Did you put a nursery together for your little one? Do you kid’s room have a color palette or theme?

We’d love to see your nursery or kid’s room – post a picture or video to your blog or to flickr or YouTube (etc) and leave a link in comments below!

Phanfare.com is a private place online to share your photos and videos with your family and friends. I was asked to review the site by Rya, a friend of MommyZabs. Being that I love testing new software and have personal opinions about friendly user interfaces I couldn’t resist checking out this new site.

Phanfare gives you 1 GB (about 1,024 MB) of free storage for your photos and videos on the site. Unlimited storage is available for $54.95 per year. I uploaded 16 photos and still have about 1,009 MB of storage left, but I am afraid that I would run out of space rather quickly. In my iPhoto I have about 14,000 photos. The free account is nice, but I feel like it is a hook to get you to buy the $55 package. Which wouldn’t be a bad deal if you wanted to spend the money. Comparatively Flickr gives you 100 MB of free space each month and only the 200 most recent photos will be displayed. A Flickr ProAccount with unlimited storage and photos displayed is $24.95 per year. Phanfare does not offer any smaller packages, but I heard that they might be changing their pricing strategy in the next few months.

My favorite feature is that I am able to highlight the photos I want to upload in my iPhoto window and then drag and drop them into my Internet browser window. I don’t have to browse and individually choose each photo to upload. Uploading 15 photos at one time took about five minutes. After every upload you do you are prompted to invite your family and friends. I found this a little annoying, but not a big deal.

Once all your photos are uploaded into an album you can rotate, fix auto levels, zoom, and revert to the original. You can also choose a photo and manually drag and drop photos in the order you want them. You can also edit your album preferences. The entire site is incredibly easy to use. The default theme to show your photos is a nice black background.

One drawback about the album is that you can only comment on the entire album, instead of an individual photo. So if you want to comment about one photo you have to describe the one photo you are commenting on.

The slideshow is very nice and easy to control. There is a menu bar that appears if you hover over the bottom of the photo. The menu bar allows you to change some of the settings. The slideshow feature of my current online photo storage site looks amateur compared to Phanfare’s slideshow.

I uploaded two small videos in my account. Phanfare automatically converts your video into Flash format to be able to be played on their site. It could take anywhere between 1 and several hours for them to finish converting your video. Even when I use Vimeo it takes them a while to convert my videos too.

Phanfare is affiliated with Shutterfly, Kodak Gallery, and Snapfish. It is easy to order prints of your photos. You will need an account with one of the three affiliates before you can order any photos, because it prompts you for your email address and password. You will get a great photo, because you upload the full quality of your photo. I currently upload photos at a lower resolution to be placed on a website, but they are not at a high enough resolution to print them as a 4×6. This is a great feature for family and friends to order the photos they want online (especially my mom!).

Finally, the biggest feature of Phanfare is their desktop application. It is available for both Windows and Macs. The desktop application allows you to:

* Manage your photos and videos locally while synchronizing your content to the web
* View and organize your photos at full size
* Upload large files faster and easier than on the web
* Edit and organize your photos and videos even when you are not connected to the web
* Choose from over 70 styles for your shared albums
* Add your own music to your slideshows
* Select the awesome Phanfare screensaver

You can also use the desktop application to embed photos and videos on blogs. This is important to me, because I really like the Flickr plugins on websites that give you mosaics of your photos and show your most recent photos.

There are many more features such as groups, sharing with your family and friends, and visitor reporting. The best feature is that it is private and you know who exactly is viewing your photos. There shouldn’t be any concern for having your photos stolen. You may have heard about Sweetney’s pug being used during a football game on Fox or the one where a girl’s photo was stolen from Flickr by Virgin Mobile and used in an advertisement. Some of my photos are private and I don’t want to show them to the world. Phanfare offers an intimate place online to share your photos without being completely public to the world.

Update:  

I have heard from Smug Mug that they offer a very similar service for $39.95 per year. If you want to shop around Smug Mug is another photo site to check out!

Do you use an online photo-sharing site? Which one? How do you like it? Do you have any privacy concerns?

One year ago I became a mom and my relationships with friends changed. The need to hang out with other Preggies and moms is an intrinsic necessity put inside us when we become pregnant.

After I came home I made play dates with almost every stay-at-home-mom that I knew. I even planned one mega-huge play date to get us all in one place. After a couple of visits with many friends I realized that I couldn’t be a friend with every mom on the planet. Also, I just didn’t hit it off with some folks. Over time I have found my close friends whom I stay in contact with regularly.

One encouraging lady that I stay in contact with regularly is McKenna, who also writes for The Mom Crowd. She has been a long time friend of mine, but we weren’t always close. We became great friends in a young married’s small group, but when she had Darah our lives went in two different directions. Three years later I was pregnant and she just had her second baby. I would go over to her house after my check-ups, because her house was close to my doctor’s office. Our friendship instantly grew and I now count her as one of my best friends. However, we wouldn’t be as close as we are now if I never had my own child.

Another place I found new/old friends is on the web. Some of my old friends had moved away and we didn’t stay in touch. After I was pregnant I was able to reconnect with friends like Amelia and Dawn (who also write for TMC) and Sharon, because they had started their own blogs. I didn’t know that Amelia had become a Bradley Birth Instructor and I was able to get some fabulous birthing advance from her before I gave birth. It was fascinating catching up on their lives through their blog posts. I have also made new friends through the web. There are a lot of supportive and encouraging moms out here in the web world.

Some of my single-friends-without-kids have been very accommodating. I love that they are free to come to my house at night and watch t.v. with me whenever they want. (Shout out to Mells and Wells!) Getting a sitter and going out with friends isn’t always an option, but having friends over while Ace sleeps is just awesome. I know once they get married and have their own families our relationship may change some, but I am selfishly enjoying all their free time for me right now.

When I didn’t have children I never understood why parents were so strict with naps and bed times. I don’t know if I ever would have fully understood the impact of a fussy, crabby child who has not napped. I don’t expect my friends-without-kids to understand bed times and the loss of spontaneity that comes with a new little one. I am still chummy with my friends-without-kids, but we don’t hang out as much as we used to. Get-togethers require calendar coordination and the stars to align before we see each other.

The magnitude of the life change a baby brings sends shockwaves through your friendships. Some relationships may fade away, while new ones begin, and others make it through the quake unscathed.

Did you find new friends after you had a baby? Did you lose any friends? Did you notice how you didn’t click with some moms you thought you would?